One comes to expect a certain level of burger greatness in the inner-north of Melbourne. It’s like it is against their code to make a bad burger or something. I came to Lazerpig with exactly this expectation. One caveat should apply here though: I was feeling a little bit 2nd hand after one too many craft beers the night before, and I’m not entirely sure that my stomach, or taste buds for that matter, were ready for a burger and chips.

By now it should be obvious that I was not impressed. This was a strange burger experience. There was something about the patty. It was perfectly cooked; medium-rare. But there was an element of freshness missing. Or perhaps some seasoning. I can’t quite put my finger on it, other than to say they just didn’t nail it. The flavour of the patty dominated, but not in a good way. Perhaps there was just a lack of flavour from the sauce combo that couldn’t bring all the elements together. The chips were an exception. Real chips; not out of a bag, but cut on site from real potatoes. And they were great. Crisp, with the skins left on. A worthy accompaniment to any burger.

I really need to vent about the service here. Sometimes, you just need the interaction with the staff to be a 2-way street. Unfortunately all I got here were grunts, and a general feeling that I was an inconvenience on a warm and sunny Sunday afternoon. Possibly one of the least friendly waitresses I have ever met. (They weren’t busy at all, so really no excuse here.)

Lazerpig is ultimately a pizza place. And the pizzas looked great. There was something enticing about the idea of a naturally fermented dough, proved for a minimum of 72 hours, with an array of delicious toppings, cooked in a wood fired oven. They did look a treat. At some point I will come back here to try the pizzas. But that day will only come once I forget about the poor quality customer service.

Lazerpig Pizza Parlour Menu, Reviews, Photos, Location and Info - Zomato


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